This Gift Will Change Your Life

It only takes 30 minutes to set up, but it pays a lifetime of dividends. Surprisingly, this isn't clickbait.

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

Hi everyone!

I hope that you’ve had a joyful, relaxing holiday season. (And if not, I hope you had a chance to air your grievances.)

Today, I want to give you a gift. Or, more accurately, I want to help you give yourself a gift: your very own personal Highlight Reel.¹

It only takes 30 minutes to set up, but it pays a lifetime of dividends.

It’s self-confidence at your fingertips.

A reminder of our awesomeness

When we go on social media, we’re bombarded by other people’s highlight reels — their best moments, fancy vacations, successes, promotions, etc. It’s great that others are doing well (no schadenfreude here), but after a while, it can all be demoralizing.

Everyone seems to be thriving….except us.

Comparison kicks into high gear. We feel like we’ve somehow fallen behind in life, or worse, that we don’t stack up to our peers. At the same time, our inner critic, sensing an opportunity, begins playing our blooper reel — our shortcomings, mistakes, missteps, screw-ups, and failures we’d rather forget.

Before long, our self-confidence is shattered.

This is where the personal Highlight Reel comes into play. It’s a simple file in your digital notes app that brings your best moments front and center, reminding you of your awesomeness.

The Highlight Reel stops negative self-talk in its tracks, and best of all, it’s always there when you need it.

I have one and I use it all the time to rebuild my confidence when I’m having a bad day.

How to create your personal Highlight Reel

The process is straightforward and should take you no more than thirty minutes to complete:

Step 1: Create a file in your favorite notes app.

The first step is to choose where to store your personal Highlight Reel.

I use Notion, but Apple Notes, Evernote, Google Docs, Microsoft Word, or another program works fine too.

(You could use a physical notebook, but I prefer digital because a) you can quickly pull up the file, and b) it’s easy to drop in screenshots.)

For the sake of this post, I’ll refer to it as the “Highlight Reel,” but you’re welcome to give it another name.

Step 2: Write down your greatest life wins.

What achievements are you most proud of? What took you a lot of effort and sacrifice to accomplish? Make a list of these moments.

Some examples:

• graduating from high school/college/grad school

• a promotion at work

• building a strong support system

• making friends

• finding a loving spouse

• raising wonderful children

• starting a newsletter

• writing a book

• recovering from an injury

• getting your health under control

• sobriety

No achievement is too small. If it’s meaningful, add it to the list.

Step 3: Screenshot nice things people have said to you.

Now it’s time to capture any nice messages you’ve received. This is where having a digital file really comes in handy.

Go through your recent text messages. Did anyone compliment you? Did someone say, “I love you”? Did you receive any words of encouragement after a tough day? Take screenshots of these messages and drop them in your Highlight Reel.

Next, do the same with your emails. Did you receive a heartfelt message from a friend or loved one? Did a client thank you for a job well done? If so, screenshot and add to the file. (Or, if you prefer, copy and paste the message.)

Step 4: Take pictures of physical objects.

Some of your best moments are displayed on shelves or hidden in drawers.

If you can, go around your house/apartment and take pictures of:

• diplomas

• nice cards you received in the mail

• acceptance letters

• trophies, etc.

Just the other day, I got the nicest Christmas card from a friend in California. I took a picture of the card and put it in my Highlight Reel.

Step 5: Recall past conversations.

Some of your best compliments happened years ago. Maybe it was words of encouragement from a parent or teacher, or a supportive pep talk from a friend back in college. Write them down, even if you have to approximate the dialogue. These moments are just as important as recent ones!

For example, back in 7th grade, my English teacher gave me an A+ on a short story about how I survived getting sucked into a tornado. (Fictional, thankfully.) “I never give out A+’s,” she told me. “You’re very talented.”

That was the first time anyone told me I was a good writer. I’ll always remember that moment.

Step 6: Bookmark for easy retrieval.

Put your Highlight Reel somewhere where you can find it on short notice. Pin it to the top of your notes app or create a shortcut on your desktop.

When you're running low on confidence, you don’t want to spend ten minutes looking for it. The more friction involved in finding it, the less likely it will be used.

Optional: Add pictures.

If you want to go all out, feel free to add family pictures, vacation photos, or any other images that bring a smile to your face. If it’s easier, put them in a photo album, especially if the original Highlight Reel file becomes unwieldy.

There is no wrong way to make a personal Highlight Reel. The important thing is that you are capturing these moments somewhere and that they’re easy to find.

Highlight Reel 1, Blooper Reel 0

Sometimes, in our lowest moments, we forget that we’ve done great things or that we’ve made a positive impact on people’s lives. This is unfortunate.

Thankfully, with your personal Highlight Reel, you won’t have to rely on your faulty memory to recall your best moments; they’re always available on-demand.

I can’t think of a better gift.

What’s in your personal Highlight Reel?

I’d love to know — what are some of your favorite items in your Highlight Reel? Let me know in the comments. I’ll share a few of mine.

And one more thing….

Could you share this article with someone who would benefit? Everyone deserves to have their best moments available right when they need it.

1. The Highlight Reel is a combination of two techniques: David Goggins’ “Cookie Jar” and Matthew Dicks’s “Compliment Sandwich.” All credit goes to them.

You can read more about the Cookie Jar and Compliment Sandwich techniques here:

Remembering our Best Selves