Hello, Adversity Weekly Roundup #27 - August 5, 2023

Why we procrastinate, a local teen's legacy of kindness, overcoming career mistakes, and the importance of showing your work

Photo credit: Jessica Ruscello on Unsplash

Happy Saturday everyone!

Welcome to the 27th edition of the Hello, Adversity Weekly Roundup.

Thank you so much for the kind words about my latest post. I am looking forward to the time off and dedicating myself to this site. I have many ideas for new features I’d like to add, but I need to address a few back-end issues first before I get to that point. I am the world’s worst person at biting off more than I can chew and I have to be mindful of taking one step at a time.

In my eagerness to share the exciting news Wednesday, I realize that I forgot the last line of my post, which I had temporarily cut but never pasted back in:

“Come join me on this journey. Let’s tackle adversity together.”

The reason I wanted to include this line is because adversity is not something that we can handle on our own. We need each other to navigate through life’s ups and downs. (It’s also the theme of the second item in this week’s roundup.)

Although I am the one who writes these posts every week, you are just as much a part of this site as I am. I value your comments, your feedback, and your camaraderie.

Without further ado, here are this week’s links:

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1. Why You Procrastinate (It Has Nothing to Do With Self-Control)

I was searching for a different article in my reading app when I came across this piece about procrastination from 2019. When I read it, I felt as if the author was speaking directly to me. Without the rigidity of a set work schedule, I am constantly tempted to go down rabbit holes and do everything but the task at hand, even with a carefully-planned to-do list.

Procrastination is something we all contend with. Whether it’s an upcoming deadline or a task we don’t feel like doing, it is easy to flee to whatever will bring us immediate gratification. Mindless distractions are way more fun.

One of the eye-opening takeaways from the article is that procrastination is in many ways an emotional response. We are not just procrastinating because we are lazy:

The particular nature of our aversion depends on the given task or situation. It may be due to something inherently unpleasant about the task itself — having to clean a dirty bathroom or organizing a long, boring spreadsheet for your boss. But it might also result from deeper feelings related to the task, such as self-doubt, low self-esteem, anxiety or insecurity. Staring at a blank document, you might be thinking, I’m not smart enough to write this. Even if I am, what will people think of it? Writing is so hard. What if I do a bad job?

When I read this, I saw my own procrastination tendencies in a new light, especially when it comes to writing. I realized that many times it’s not the writing itself that I dread, but rather the fear that I have nothing meaningful to say. When faced with this fear, I’d much rather play Immaculate Grid.

The author points out that the longer we delay doing something unpleasant in favor of satisfying short-term needs, the worse we will feel, both about ourselves and the task at hand. Procrastination has a pernicious snowball effect.

What I liked about the article was that it also explores the psychology behind why we procrastinate, tracing its origins back to our distant ancestors who prioritized short-term needs over the uncertain future. The author then offers several ways to combat procrastination that addresses the root causes of our behavior.

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Source: https://www.ht40.org

2. Shoulder Check Showcase honors Darien teen

Sometimes, I come across stories even when I am not looking for them.

On the news Wednesday night was a story about Hayden Thorsen, a 16-year-old hockey goalie from Darien, Connecticut who passed away suddenly in 2022.

In the weeks that followed Hayden’s passing, his family received numerous letters from people who knew “Haydes”. These letters depicted Hayden as someone who always liked to check in on his friends to see how they were doing. His parents were so touched to learn about this side of their son that they created the #HT40 Foundation to honor his legacy.

From the website:

Our mission is to build a culture of mutual support and encouragement, one peer group at a time. Because so many of us, for so many reasons, could use a pat on the back, reminding us WE ARE NOT ALONE.

The organization recently held the Shoulder Check Showcase, an exhibition game featuring professional men’s and women’s hockey players, to draw attention to the need for kindness and compassion.

Study after study has shown that teens are struggling with their mental health and experience feelings of loneliness and despair. As Hayden has shown, all it takes is one little action—one text, one hand on the shoulder, one “Hey, how are you doing?” in the hallway—to make a positive difference in someone’s life. No action is too small.

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3. Your Biggest Career Mistakes—and What You Learned From Them

The Wall Street Journal recently asked readers to share their biggest career mistakes and what they learned from their experiences.

I always enjoy articles that shed light on our failures and setbacks, especially when they happen to everyday people. It humanizes failure and shows that even those whom society deems “successful” often took a circuitous route to get to where they are today. When we fall into the comparison trap, it is easy to assume that we are the only ones who ever fail or mess up, when that is not the case.

I had trouble relating to some of the advice. (I need to promote myself more? Yikes.) But there were learnings that were spot on. Bradd Schiffman’s story about turning down a job at IBM because he was afraid to move to upstate New York resonated with me. Schiffman eventually realized that if he was going to live the life he dreamed of, he was going to need to take a major risk at some point.

Taken together, these stories paint an important picture. Our careers will be filled with ups and downs, triumphs and setbacks, smooth sailing and rough waters. But in most instances, what we think is an insurmountable career obstacle is something that can be overcome. It might just require taking the road less traveled.

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4. Finished Reading: Show Your Work!: 10 Ways to Share Your Creativity and Get Discovered by Austin Kleon

Austin Kleon is an expert on creativity who has written several books on the subject. Although I have been meaning to read Kleon’s most well-known book, Steal Like an Artist, I was drawn to the premise of Show Your Work!, as I am actively trying to build an audience on this site.

Show Your Work! is a quick read packed with practical advice, including how to join a community of like-minded creatives (a “scenius”), how to share your process as you make your art, and how to convey your expertise to your audience. Kleon extols the virtues of being an amateur and taking risks as a way of learning and honing one’s craft. He also touches on how to navigate the ups and downs of creative life, as there will inevitably be setbacks along the way.

Whether you are figuring out your unique creative angle or are struggling to find a community that shares your interests, this book is for you.

If you have a story you’d like me to include in a future newsletter, please email me at HelloAdversity@substack.com or leave a comment below.

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