The Unplugging Playbook, Part 1
How to take a proper break, avoid burnout, and recharge your batteries.
“Even when away from their computers and mobile devices - even on vacation - millions itch to check email, Web surf, or do some Googling. They seek an Internet connection the way a man with his hair on fire seeks a pond.” - Alexander Green
Today’s post is the first in a two-part series on how to unplug from the craziness of the modern world. (Thanks to
and for the topic suggestion!)Let’s dive in.
The importance of taking a break
Everyday life is exhausting. We’re bombarded with inputs and stimuli 24/7, and our brains — although wonderful machines — are not designed to operate on high alert at all times. Eventually, without a proper break, we combust.
That’s what unplugging seeks to avoid — burning out in spectacular fashion.
There is no one right way to unplug, which Merriam-Webster defines as “To temporarily refrain from using electronic devices” and/or “To temporarily withdraw from the responsibilities and obligations of everyday life.”
What matters is not how you’re unplugging as much as why you’re doing it in the first place.
There are a few different ways to unplug:
Duration: You can do it for a day, a week, a month, or indefinitely.
Location: It can be an exotic vacation to a foreign country, a day trip to the lake, or a restful staycation.
Commitment: You could go all the way and cut out all electronics, or it could be as simple as logging out of social media or avoiding the news.
I know that for many of you, it’s not possible to unplug for too long given life’s unrelenting demands, but even finding a way to steal a few hours to yourself can make a positive difference.
What follows are 12 steps you can take to unplug from the modern world and have a restful, restorative break. I’ll cover steps 1-6 today and 7-12 next week.
You don’t have to complete all twelve steps, but the more you can do, the more relaxed you’ll feel.
Throughout the post, I’ll share my experience implementing these steps on my recent break. (As you’ll see, I did some better than others!)
1. Ask, “What do I want to achieve on my time off?”
You’re unplugging for a reason. Is it to stop doomscrolling on social media? Is it to avoid political news? Is it to work on a creative project? Read a book you’ve been putting off forever? Spend time with family? Or is it simply to do nothing at all?
If you know why you want to unplug, it will be that much easier to stay the course. (We’ll talk about what to do when you’re tempted later.) For example, if you want to reduce stress or prevent burnout, keep this purpose top of mind. Write it down if you have to.
If you feel anxious about giving up social media, checking the news, or doing work, make a list of everything you want to accomplish on your time off. When your mind starts to panic about what you’re giving up, think about everything you’ll get to do instead.
Your list will inspire you to stay committed to your why.
My list included spending time with my sister and her family, scoping out an ebook idea, and reading The Lincoln Highway, by Amor Towles. (HIGHLY recommend, by the way.)
By defining my objectives ahead of time, I was able to accomplish everything I wanted to get done on my break.
2. Write down unfinished tasks BEFORE you unplug.
There is something called the Zeigarnik effect, which refers to our tendency to remember incomplete or interrupted tasks better than completed ones.
This is useful in some contexts, but not when we’re trying to relax!
Dwelling on unresolved action items drains our mental energy. Instead of feeling restored, we ruminate on what we still have to do. If we don’t account for these unresolved items before we unplug, we’ll end up more exhausted than we were previously.
Before your break, write down any unfinished tasks, no matter how small. Writing them down ensures that you won’t forget them when you get back, preserving mental energy to do more important things, like napping in a hammock.
When possible, add context to your unresolved tasks. For example, if you have an important work project that you didn’t finish before your vacation, instead of thinking about it every waking hour, write up a quick one-page document that outlines the current status of the project and 3-5 action items you can take to resume the project once you get back. Make it as easy as possible for your future self to jump back into it.
Then, your mind can finally shut off.
3. Set boundaries.
Without proper boundaries, we are doomed to fail. We either sabotage our efforts or we accidentally let others infringe on our personal time.
If you want to unplug from the news, set the boundary that you won’t watch TV until the local news comes on at night. Or, if your friends and family usually text you news stories throughout the day, tell them to stop until you return from your break.
When it comes to work, make it clear that you will not answer emails under any condition, and that you absolutely must not be contacted. Even if you’ve got someone covering for you, there is always that one aggressive coworker who will email you with a question, even though they know you’re on vacation. As soon as someone sees you responding to an email when you’re supposed to be out of office, it’s game over. You’ll always carry that reputation, and people will take advantage of it.
Boundaries are also essential for anything else you want to get away from. Set clear expectations for acceptable and unacceptable behavior, and communicate these boundaries with others so they won’t unintentionally derail you.
This is one area where I failed. I didn’t set any boundaries for myself, and I failed to tell people that I was unplugging for a few weeks. As a result, I was constantly pulled into the vortex of current events and trivial requests that could have waited until I was ready to “plug back in.”
4. Design your environment for success.
In Atomic Habits, author James Clear talks about designing our environment to reinforce good habits and make bad habits more difficult. For example, if we want to eat healthier, we can chop up fruits and vegetables ahead of time so we’ll always have a healthy snack we can grab on the go. If we want to stop watching TV, we could unplug the TV after use or take the batteries out of the remote.
The same idea also applies here.
To avoid the news, you can set boundaries, yes, but you can also make checking the news as hard as possible. During the day, you could put your phone on airplane mode or disable notifications. Or if necessary, you could delete all your news apps.
Back when I was working, I would remove my work email from my phone when I went on vacation. If I wanted to check my email, I would have to log in on my computer to do it. The extra hurdle reduced the urge to stay plugged into what was going on at the office.
If these steps seem too easy to get around, you might want to take more drastic action, such as going somewhere without WiFi or giving someone your phone to hold during the day.
At all times, remember your why. The benefits of unplugging far outweigh any temporary discomfort.
I had mixed results with this step. There were days when I spent most of my time outside, without electronics, and it was wonderful. But on rainy days, when I was stuck inside, it was too easy to check my phone and computer.
5. Don’t beat yourself up if you derail. Learn from it.
Here’s a cold hard truth: you will slip up at some point.
To fully unplug 100% of the time isn’t realistic. We are humans. We get tempted. We have the collective willpower of a child who was just told not to press all the elevator buttons.
If you can’t help scrolling social media, checking the news, or logging into your work email, show yourself some grace. Although it’s not ideal, it’s not the end of the world.
If it happens, figure out a way to prevent it from happening again. Maybe you need to make alterations to your environment or set clearer boundaries.
One slip-up doesn’t mean you’ll never unplug again. Just don’t let one mistake turn into a downward spiral. Although I wasn’t able to fully unplug 100% of the time, on balance I still had a restful break.
You don’t have to be perfect.
6. Have a designated cheat time.
Given what we talked about in the last step — how we’re almost guaranteed to slip up — we can either dread this inevitability or we can plan for it.
Everyone needs an outlet. If you’re stressing out about unplugging cold turkey, build in a designated “cheat” time.
If you don’t think you can go a whole day without social media, give yourself 15 minutes to scroll at a set time each day. If you need to stay connected to what’s going on in the world, watch the news at 6. If you need to check your work email, have you learned nothing?? check it first thing in the morning or late at night.
Once again, I had mixed results with this step. In the beginning, I resisted checking news and email until nighttime, but ultimately fell back into the habit of checking multiple times per day. Eventually, I bargained with myself to check twice per day, which seemed to work best.
Click here to read part 2 in this series.
What do you think of this list? Let me know in the comments.
In case you missed it
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Love the first six steps listed here - so many of which i resonate with. #2 is one that i actually have never really done myself. I mean i have it in my head, but writing it down and then putting it aside actually makes a lot of sense. What I particularly love about these though, is your personal note at the end about how successful (or not successful) you were at each item itself. It lends to a lot more authenticity, and makes it infinitely more relatable. Also connects very well to #5 - easier to give yourself grace if the author of the article (or speaker etc) is learning to do the same. Look forward to pt 2!
I'm not giving up my BritBox, Chris, and you can't make me! But, everything else can go/has never been a priority/if you really need me, call, don't text. 😘 xo